Long before my Typing Slave was published, she had befriended the wise and perspicacious human/author known as Natalie Damschroder, who displays her great insights in the following interview. Enjoy!
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1) Why did you decide to be a writer instead of a cat sanctuary owner?
I have three cats rescued from the shelter, so I'd say I'm both.
2) Why do you think cats are better than dogs? (Since you call yourself a writer, I trust your answer will be eloquent.)
Cats are smarter than dogs, they take care of their own grooming, and they don't pant. Also, cats are great at helping you focus on what's important--you know, sitting in front of the computer monitor to tell you it's time for a break, or shoving your carefully stacked manuscript pages to the floor so you stop procrastinating the revisions.
3) On the off-chance you have yet to incorporate cats into your fiction, when do you plan to rectify this egregious error and demonstration of poor writing skills?
Meankitty, I think you have just hit on the key to my success. I will immediately include a cat in every story. I haven't had one so far because most of my books are romantic adventures, and I don't think cats appreciate being shot at or flying in airplanes.
4) What are your favorite works of fiction involving cats or favorite fictional cats?
My favorite fictional cat is Crookshanks in the Harry Potter books. He saves Sirius's life! That's true heroism!
5) Do you have any amazing, or at least humorous, real life cat stories you'd like to share?
Nothing as amazing or humorous as your stories, Meankitty. You'll be very pleased to know, however, that our youngest cat, BG, is a true master of the one-paw. She also excels at knowing when to turn it into a double. Our middle cat, Frisbee, is a true demon kitty, purring and affectionate one moment, slashing to the bone in the next.
6) Multiple choice 1. What is your preference and why?
A) Long hair
B) Short hair
C) No hair
-- Note: I am not, of course, referring to the hirsute qualities of your most recent hero or heroine.
Long hair, by a landslide!
7) Multiple choice 2. You have a writing deadline but the cat who rules you wants some attention. Desperately. Do you:
A) Lock the cat in another room and keep working?
B) Pet the cat for a couple minutes and then toss her cruelly aside?
C) Pet the cat as long as she wants because you know it will inspire and refresh you?
-- Note: If you answered anything besides C, we suggest you consider the fact you could have written a much better book if you had been inspired and refreshed instead of mean to the cat.
Obviously C is the correct answer! I much prefer being inspired and refreshed when I'm in the recliner reading a book, however, than when I'm trying to see my monitor. Cat hair in the keyboard, man, not cool.
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And now for the REALLY interesting part, my Q&A with the Cats!
1) So, your human writes books. Does this mean he or she is home all day and easy to access? Elaborate if necessary.
You're touching a sore subject there. The infuriating woman has installed an unscalable gate at the top of the stairs, so I can't get to her while she's writing. All because the downstairs carpet is a cat's dream. But I get my revenge by covering her bed and favorite chair with cat hair, and when she's upstairs, I'm always nearby, ready for a pet or, if necessary, to slash the ankles.
2) How large a proportion of her income do you have her devote to your gourmet tuna, cat beds, toys and other basic necessities?
Puh-leeze. She has a down comforter with a microfleece blanket, AND the spouse keeps clothes on the bed. I have no need for lowly "cat" beds. And I much prefer the kids' hair ties and headbands to silly fake mice and feathers on the rare occasions I indulge my inner kitten.
3) What are your techniques for distracting your human during crucial writing moments, just because it's fun?
Check it out: Ingenious, I say!
I have three cats rescued from the shelter, so I'd say I'm both.
2) Why do you think cats are better than dogs? (Since you call yourself a writer, I trust your answer will be eloquent.)
Cats are smarter than dogs, they take care of their own grooming, and they don't pant. Also, cats are great at helping you focus on what's important--you know, sitting in front of the computer monitor to tell you it's time for a break, or shoving your carefully stacked manuscript pages to the floor so you stop procrastinating the revisions.
3) On the off-chance you have yet to incorporate cats into your fiction, when do you plan to rectify this egregious error and demonstration of poor writing skills?Meankitty, I think you have just hit on the key to my success. I will immediately include a cat in every story. I haven't had one so far because most of my books are romantic adventures, and I don't think cats appreciate being shot at or flying in airplanes.
4) What are your favorite works of fiction involving cats or favorite fictional cats?
My favorite fictional cat is Crookshanks in the Harry Potter books. He saves Sirius's life! That's true heroism!
5) Do you have any amazing, or at least humorous, real life cat stories you'd like to share?
Nothing as amazing or humorous as your stories, Meankitty. You'll be very pleased to know, however, that our youngest cat, BG, is a true master of the one-paw. She also excels at knowing when to turn it into a double. Our middle cat, Frisbee, is a true demon kitty, purring and affectionate one moment, slashing to the bone in the next.
6) Multiple choice 1. What is your preference and why?
A) Long hair
B) Short hair
C) No hair
-- Note: I am not, of course, referring to the hirsute qualities of your most recent hero or heroine.
Long hair, by a landslide!
7) Multiple choice 2. You have a writing deadline but the cat who rules you wants some attention. Desperately. Do you:
A) Lock the cat in another room and keep working?
B) Pet the cat for a couple minutes and then toss her cruelly aside?
C) Pet the cat as long as she wants because you know it will inspire and refresh you?
-- Note: If you answered anything besides C, we suggest you consider the fact you could have written a much better book if you had been inspired and refreshed instead of mean to the cat.
Obviously C is the correct answer! I much prefer being inspired and refreshed when I'm in the recliner reading a book, however, than when I'm trying to see my monitor. Cat hair in the keyboard, man, not cool.
***
And now for the REALLY interesting part, my Q&A with the Cats!
1) So, your human writes books. Does this mean he or she is home all day and easy to access? Elaborate if necessary.
You're touching a sore subject there. The infuriating woman has installed an unscalable gate at the top of the stairs, so I can't get to her while she's writing. All because the downstairs carpet is a cat's dream. But I get my revenge by covering her bed and favorite chair with cat hair, and when she's upstairs, I'm always nearby, ready for a pet or, if necessary, to slash the ankles.
2) How large a proportion of her income do you have her devote to your gourmet tuna, cat beds, toys and other basic necessities?
Puh-leeze. She has a down comforter with a microfleece blanket, AND the spouse keeps clothes on the bed. I have no need for lowly "cat" beds. And I much prefer the kids' hair ties and headbands to silly fake mice and feathers on the rare occasions I indulge my inner kitten.
3) What are your techniques for distracting your human during crucial writing moments, just because it's fun?
Check it out: Ingenious, I say!
4) Tell me about the felines in your human's fiction. How often do they appear and how big a part do they play?
I don't read that trash. Romantic adventure, indeed. As if cats have any interest in such things.
5) If you could make one change to your human, what would it be?
I'd make her get rid of the spouse, because he has the better side of the bed and always kicks us out.
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Sincerely,
Meankitty
