The other night DH and I got only three hours of sleep because Loud Thing (#1) had developed a spiky fever and other flu-like discomforts. It was hard to sleep with that hanging over our heads, so we took her to the doctor first thing in the morning, fearing the flu.
Good news: not the flu.
Mediocre news: it's coxsachievirus (hand, foot and mouth disease), which she seems to be especially prone to. No idea why--perhaps she has especially sensitive hands and feet? This means fever for a couple days, loss of appetite, crankiness, uncomfortable blisters in mouth, hands & feet. Nothing we can't deal with.
That afternoon, in order to survive the rest of the day without making any dangerous, zombiefied mistakes like leaving the gas burner on the stove on all night (no comment), DH and I tried, for the first time, to take a quick nap while both girls were awake. The cats do it all the time. Why not humans?
Here is the sequence of events that comprised our one hour "nap" (and yes, I really mean the sleeping kind of nap):
4:01 pm: Gave girls specific instructions to leave us alone. Started a dvd. Told them they could wake us when it was done but not until then.
Good news: not the flu.
Mediocre news: it's coxsachievirus (hand, foot and mouth disease), which she seems to be especially prone to. No idea why--perhaps she has especially sensitive hands and feet? This means fever for a couple days, loss of appetite, crankiness, uncomfortable blisters in mouth, hands & feet. Nothing we can't deal with.
That afternoon, in order to survive the rest of the day without making any dangerous, zombiefied mistakes like leaving the gas burner on the stove on all night (no comment), DH and I tried, for the first time, to take a quick nap while both girls were awake. The cats do it all the time. Why not humans?Here is the sequence of events that comprised our one hour "nap" (and yes, I really mean the sleeping kind of nap):
4:01 pm: Gave girls specific instructions to leave us alone. Started a dvd. Told them they could wake us when it was done but not until then.
4:03 pm: #2 asked if our taking a nap meant she got a pacifier (she gets her paci during naps--hey, *somebody* was taking one!)
4:05 pm: #1 and #2 fought over what dvd to watch (when we'd already chosen and started the dvd they were going to by god watch because DH suckered into buying it for #2 after the doctor visit)
4:10 pm: My sister called to find out if #2 had swine flu.
4:14 pm: The cats got in a huge, squalling tussle at the foot of our bed.
4:16 pm: #2 wanted a bottle of juice. Having cruelly denied our poor, viral child a pacifier, we caved on the bottle since she needs as many liquids as possible.
4:20 pm: Meankitty sat in the doorway and scratched the door jamb while staring at my husband.
4:21 pm: DH threw his pillow at her to make her stop.
4:22 pm: DH had to get up and get his pillow.
4:27 pm: #2 decided she didn't like the movie and wanted to color.
4:31 pm: #1 complained about #2 using all the crayons and not sharing (there are 25,876 crayons).
4:41 pm, ten blissful minutes later: #2 needed help putting her pants on.
4:45 pm: #2 needed help with the potty.
4:47 pm: #2 needed help putting her pants on again.
4:51 pm: Door to door Jesus salesman wanted to help US; should have suggested babysitting while we napped.
4:53 pm: The cats decided to practice for NASCAT.
5:00 pm, when we had originally planned to get up: #1 wanted to use the scissors, and I said no.
5:05 pm: #1 wanted to complain about not getting to use the scissors.
5:19 pm: #2, waking me from a deep sleep, brought me a bunch of cut up paper flowers that #1 had prepared for her -- with the scissors -- so I could admire their beauty.
5:22 pm: #1 and #2 got in a kung-fu battle in the living room, right next to the bedroom door, imitating the movie they'd seen (Barbie and the Three Musketeers--those French hussies were secretly karate masters). Since the scissors had already been confiscated, no one was hurt. No one under the age of 18. My brain and body were suffering immensely.
5:26 pm: The rain and wind picked up outside.
5:27 pm: Falling persimmons from the tree next to the back porch startled the cats, which upset #1 and #2. There was much screaming.
5:29 pm: #1 asked if there was going to be a tornado. A tornado of exhausted RAGE, I told her.
5:30 pm: The alarm I'd set on the stove went off so I'd remember to check on dinner. To my disappointment, dinner had not magically prepared itself.
5:39 pm: #2 crawled into bed with us looking for her pacifier, which she'd left on the headboard the night before, and we realized her fever had spiked again.
5:40 pm: We gave up and got up. #1 informed us that #2 had peed all over the bathroom floor (totally separate from the time she requested our help in the potty). There wasn't much left--it had mostly drained down the vent.
"Why didn't you let us about this when this HAPPENED?" I asked her.
"Because you TOLD me not to WAKE you," she replied.
I guess I should just be thankful it wasn't something worse.
What types of things usually interrupt your naps? Cats and humans are both welcome to respond.
3 comments:
I'm so so so sorry but I'm DYING laughing here.
I love naps, but I don't have little kids. I did learn to sleep through my son's band practices, cats practicing for NASCAT and ringing phones.
I can't sleep with a cat in the room. They always scratch or pounce JUST when I'm getting comfy.
Oddly, I don't sleep well at night. Too much wakes me up.
LoL. Too funny!
I, too, am laughing my head off (while cursing AOL for crashing on me while I was talking to you, and it won't reboot!). I'm sorry--I just wish this was from your fevered imagination, not your fevered life!
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