I have a list of questions that bug me from time to time, and I thought I'd ask them here in the event any of you have the answers:
1) Why does my favorite writing website www.thesaurus.com stink now? Instead of displaying many entries with awesomely long lists of synonyms and related words plus every entry the word in question appears in, it now shows 1-2 dictionary style entries with fewer synonyms than Microsoft Word gives you, which is sad. Well, at least it hasn't edited out words like "sexy", which Word doesn't acknowledge.
2) Why does child #2, anytime she is both shirtless and in her room, insist on a wild ride on her bouncy horse? When she's in her room and dressed, she prefers her loud piano, her table and chairs, her dishes, her house, emptying out all her drawers and toyboxes, her laundry bin, etc. But remove any of her clothing and it's got to be the horse.
3) Why is every daytime knock at my door a roving religious person instead of Publisher's Clearing House, my husband home early from work to surprise me with lunch, or my nice new neighbor asking if she can mow my yard because she's trying to incorporate more exercise into her daily routine?
4) Why can Meankitty make holes in our special pet-proof screen when all she's doing is flexing her claws in them to protest the fact that I'm on the porch and she is not? We paid a pretty penny to have those screens redone, and now look at them. The holes are big enough for ladybugs to crawl through, as we discovered yesterday afternoon while I was watching the girls hit each other with sticks. Well, technically, we discovered it last night, but I think the bug invasion happened during the afternoon.
5) Why have only a couple people viewed Meankitty's awesome "How To Be A Meankitty" video series on YouTube? Meankitty has posted a selection of her highly regarded tips on how to subjugate humans, but they are receiving minimal attention. Maybe not enough cats surf YouTube. Here's a short one:
Note: Any comments which respond to #5 with "Because it sucks" may be deleted. That answer was already considered and discarded as being obviously untrue.
6) Why can't I get dry beans to cook right in my crock pot? Everytime I try (and yes, I add enough liquid), no matter how long I leave them in there, they come out a bit crunchy, which is not how we like our beans around here. Ok, maybe green beans, esp, when stirfried in sesame oil, but not pintos or black beans or 15 bean soup. Once we cooked a crock of beans for 2 days. Granted, I was pregnant at the time and we sort of forgot the crock pot was bubbling away in the garage (I couldn't bear the smell of cooking food), but it didn't bubble dry and the beans were STILL not as soft as when I cook them on the stove.
7) Why, if people are worried about what's going to happen to the Earth because we humans are trashing it, don't more of us reduce waste, recycle, ride share, save electricity, shop for used goods, go green, and reuse or fix things instead of purchasing new (to them) versions? (My sister made me put this one in there.)
8) Why haven't I thrown out the one remaining cactus hubby gave me last year even though there have been multiple cactus needle incidents, including one where the hubby's hand and wrist looked like they'd been painted dark orange from the forest of cactus needles and seeping blood? It took us over an hour to pluck enough of the miniscule needles until he could ignore the burning pain, poor man, an hour we didn't have because we were supposed to be cleaning house prior to a dinner party.
9) Why, whenever I intend to surpass a certain dollar amount at the store in order to use a coupon (like the $13.50 off a $90 grocery purchase coupon I tried to use last night) do I come up several dollars short despite grabbing things randomly off the shelves; but, when I'm trying to limit my grocery spending because money is tight, does the bill inevitably top $200? I can't even REMEMBER the last time I got out of the grocery for less than $100. Oh, wait, yes I can -- last night when my $13.50 coupon was about to expire. Because there were many people in line behind me and grabbing a box of candy bars or handful of People Magazines to increase my tally wasn't worth it, I just let it slide. Big sigh.
10) Why are so many of my sentences so freaking long?
11) Why aren't more people participating in the TRS Diva Contest? Does it take too much time to read the free fiction and fun entries that are in the opening round? Come on, skip a few blogs (except this one) to make some more time in your day and play along! http://www.theromancestudio.com/diva.php
Jody W.
A SPELL FOR SUSANNAH--Available now from Samhain Publishing
http://www.jodywallace.com * http://meankittybox.blogspot.com
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8 comments:
Reply for #6. Soak them overnight in water before you put them in to cook. :)
Lori
Yup, I agree with Lori... Soak them overnight, and if possible drain and add new water at least once, this helps with the windiness in the digestive process :)
I have no answers. But I thank you for the amusing distraction from my four clients, all of whom are flooding my inbox with work in the last minutes before I go out of town. *sigh*
Keep a lid on the beans while they're soaking overnight if you don't want to cats to drink from the bowl and tip it over while drinking from it.
And don't forget and leave them soaking longer than overnight or they will fester and stink in ways you might not want to imagine. (If you don't have time to put them in the crock pot to cook, put them in the fridge.
And the answer for your sister is that the people who aren't willing to find ways to do any of those things don't actually care; they probably expect other people to do all the hard stuff for them. Very much like cats, actually - except my cats don't drive SUVs.
1) People at thesaurus.com are at a loss for words.
2) She's rehearsing for the revival of Lady Godiva.
3) There are more people on the planet promoting their religion than are willing to give you money or food or mow your lawn.
4) MK is letting the ladybugs inside so she has something to chase in the wee hours of the morning while you're trying to sleep.
5) Beats me.
6) See above comments about soaking.
7) People are lazy and don't like the inconvenience of being "green" but have the energy to complain about the world going to hell in a handbasket.
8) Umm....You are somewhat sadistic and what to see if your hubby has learned to flinch away from the area where the cactus lives?
9) Murphy's Law of shopping.
10) Long sentences are you being you ;)
11) Beats me.
Had to laugh at #9 (and your shirtless, horse-riding kiddo).
I went into Kroger with a fist full of those coupons they send out and ended up spending $90. My bill is usually $50. So from now on I'm tossing the coupons.
Good questions. Nr. 2 -- When your back is turned, Mean Kitty tells your daughter what to do. Nr. 5 -- I'll watch it tomorrow. My husband is sleeping across the hall now, and I don't want to wake him. Nr. 7 -- the people who don't do this listened to a certain president who for years told us there was no global warming. Nr. 10 -- you write long sentences because you can. :)
#5 too cute, my cat drives me crazy licking my coke cans an glasses I drink from.
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