Hee Hee! Cat Fattie!

Annual vet trip today for the BIG BIG D-Man and myself. Typing Slave tricked us into the little blue boxes and carried us to the car, and after that into the vet's office, where we sat and glared holes through her while she attempted to prevent Loud Thing from licking the dirty floor, bodyslamming the unfortunate adopt-a-stupid-puppy cage or eating the potentially poisonous plants.

When it was our time in the exam room, the vet assistant blithely attempted to pick up my carrier in one hand and BIG BIG D-Man's carrier in the other only to find that one of the two carriers seemed to be filled with lead.

"Wow, somebody's a big fella," said the vet assistant while Typing Slave smiled and nodded and Loud Thing wiped drool all over her (TS's) face.

About the exam experience, the less said the better except for one detail. When Typing Slave described the daily habits and health of us cats, she asked the vet to verify that the unusual formations along BIG BIG D-Man's back and ribs were nothing to worry about.

"Oh," said the vet, rubbing up and down BIG BIG D-Man's enormous body, where he has a series of lumpy lumps like extra ribs. "Well, that's unexpected."

It seems that not only does BIG BIG D-Man have kitty love handles, but they are DOG love handles! They are not usually found in cats in that particular formation, although canine DNA might explain why D is so large. He obviously had the canine DNA implanted in his make-up the night he escaped the house and to return to us an ALIEN. Honestly, I just think this proves the theory I've had about him all along.

Sincerely,
MK